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User talk:Talkyflower1868
Welcome Hi, welcome to Creepypasta Wiki! Thanks for your edit to the Shadow men page. Please be sure to read all of the Site Rules, as it is important to follow them. Failure to abide by them may result in your account being blocked. Read some new pastas by checking out or browse by topic by checking out the Genre Listing. Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything! ClericofMadness (talk) 02:22, January 17, 2017 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 02:57, January 17, 2017 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 22:31, January 22, 2017 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 00:19, January 24, 2017 (UTC) Hello... It's me... Hey Talky. It's me, Derpyspaghetti. I don't know if you know this, but your latest story, The wire man is going to be deleted. Don't get mad at anyone but me, I'm the one who marked it for deletion. I just thought I'd give you a bit of a review before it goes, as I can see you're the type of person who doesn't want to give up. That's great. That's how most regular authors start out. Just thought I'd give you a couple tips on how not to get your next story deleted. So, first off, I like the concept behind this. It was interesting and kept me reading. Problem is the execution. Here are a couple tips: First off - and this is the biggest thing I noticed - Dialogue is separated by returns and inside quotation marks. You do this at the start of your story with the wire man and the boy talking, but then stop when the boy confronts his sister. Secondly, time moves through your stories strangely. You say he's nine first. Then the wire man kills someone (in the reader's head, the boy is still nine), then you say he's twelve. That dramatically changes the way the reader would perceive events, and you don't mention it until much later. Third point, and this is kind of related to the second, is that you don't break up paragraphs in your story. That is integral to having a well-flowing plot, as paragraph breaks, in the reader's mind is a fresh start. If you have a break, it's much easier to say time has passed than if you don't. Anyway, those are just a couple tips from me to you. If you really want personal help with your stories, post them on the Writer's Workshop for additional help. Message me or an admin if you need anything. ''If a house is made out of a potato, Is it a potato, or is it a house? '' 00:48, January 24, 2017 (UTC) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 02:01, January 29, 2017 (UTC) :As you've ignored the warning above and posted another story that failed to meet the bare minimum quality standards (i.e. properly capitalizing proper nouns and sentences, failing to properly use quotations/dashes, and a majority of the story being written in broken English for example), you are being banned for three days. Please note that each consecutive infraction will result in a lengthier ban. Please use the links given above and the writer's workshop for examples of how you can improve. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 17:33, January 29, 2017 (UTC)